I hadn’t been to the mall since before Christmas. I only went last week because Kay wanted to look for a “special kind” of denim shorts. I didn’t know what she meant at the time, nor do I now, even after she bought the shorts. I couldn’t tell you the specialness of ‘em if you stuck a gun to my head.
By the way, I went to the mall with Kay because I didn’t answer the “What else have you got to do?” question seriously. “Drive a roofing nail in my foot” was not an acceptable answer.
There was no way I was going to be of help to Kay in her lengthy short search, so when we got to the mall I just sat down on one of those torturous benches and watched people walk by. I hate to see people who sit and watch people walk by, so I managed to look like I wasn’t looking. I have a knack. It’s really more of a gift.
One thing I picked up on was a current fashion trend for young ladies. It may have been going on for a couple of years, but I just picked up on it. What they’re doing is wearing these really short denim shorts. Not like Kay bought. Shorter than that. Way shorter. So short that in some cases, the inside of the pockets extend beyond the hem. It looks tacky as all get out. Bound to be why it’s so popular.
I also saw one girl wearing a pair of jeans that had gaping rips from the top of the thigh down to her knees. The inside of her pockets were also visible. I’ve seen torn jeans before, but none quite as revealing. Again, no one could tell that I was even looking.
Speaking of socks, I saw this junior high aged kid walk by wearing black socks with tennis shoes. Black socks. I don’t know if you’re aware, but guys can now wear black socks with shorts and athletic shoes. First time I saw anyone under the age of 50 wearing black socks was when I picked up Virginia’s grandson after spring training football practice.
Ryan was wearing black socks with his Nikes. I asked him how long that had been going on and he said, “I don’t know. Probably over a year.” I had no idea. No one keeps me up to date on stuff like that. I’ve had a pair of black athletic socks for a couple of years now. One of the brothers got ‘em for me for Christmas. I thought it was a joke. I could’ve been wearing ‘em all along and no one would’ve laughed. No, they would still laugh.
Back at the mall I saw a three-year-old with both his shirt and shorts inside out. His parents acted like they didn’t even notice. I don’t know if the kid dressed himself wrong or the parents were embracing the new “inside out” trend for kids. If you scratch this thing, you’ll probably find Justin Bieber behind it.
I did see a lady wearing a shirt that I really liked. I was sitting over by the giant talking tree area. I’m not sure the tree talks anymore, ‘cause they took its face off. Hard to talk without a face. I don’t know why I felt I had to tell you that, but it seemed important.
Anyway, the young mother was wearing a tight green Tee shirt that had big eyeballs on the front. The protruding eyes made it appear that immediately below her neck was a giant frog face. I thought it cute as it could be.
Kay didn’t think the look all that cute. I pointed the lady out when Kay walked up with her short’s purchase. She wanted to know why I felt I had to stare at women at the talking tree. I told her I didn’t think the tree talked anymore. She gave me ol’ eye roll.
Just irks me no end. I get in trouble when all along I didn’t even want to be there. Why is it you can never find a roofing nail when you need one?
END
To view Mark and Brad’s latest restaurant review click on pic.