Hospital waiting room

 

Hayter for January 29, 2023

“A waiting room experience”

            I didn’t intend to start our visit until later this afternoon, but I needed something to do while waiting on Kay. She’s having cataract surgery. I should know which eyeball it is, but I’m a man. Men’s brains don’t store things well.

            I do know that Kay’s eye that there messing with, is the one without astigmatism. They’ll do that eye on our next visit. When I asked Kay about her bad eye, she said she had interocular astigmatism. I said, “Oh, yeah, that one.”

            You may know this, but when you age, stuff starts happening to you. Women seem to catch on to what’s happening to them. Men? Well, I can’t speak for all of them, but I generally wait until Kay tells me I need to see a doctor. I think that’s why there are so many widows.

            The nurse took Kay away about an hour ago, leaving me in this nice waiting room. It’s a large area broken up by alcoves and furniture that’s well placed so you don’t have somebody staring right at you from four feet away.

            I wish you’d listen to the lady at the registration desk? That woman has the most pleasant disposition of anyone who ever worked at the entrance of any hospital. She’s fielded questions of every nature. Most people were kind, but some were quite upset. It would be very difficult for even an angry person to blow their stack in front of that lady. If it happened in front of me, the guy would end up having to remove his foot from my rear, because I would confront him.

            The lady talking on her cell over there by the couch is not quite as considerate. She’s had her phone on speaker since the moment I arrived. She has addressed several home and business problems since I’ve been here. 

            She’s been walking around and talking up a storm. She is yet to enter my space which is good because I can easily become the son of my father. Dad didn’t suffer rude people well. The lady talks so loud you’d think she was in a bus terminal. – I’m guessing bus terminals are loud.

            Now that I’ve got you upset with the lady, I’m already over it. I’ve been reading up on how to lose your anger by transferring it. All you do is zone out.  I’ll bet I’m hard for you to see right now.

            Since I’m over that inconsiderate nabob, I’ve gotta tell you about the coffee machine. It is the best I’ve ever used. Look across the room, just past the inconsiderate loud lady. See the dark-coffee-colored contraption that’s the shape of a tall two-door refrigerator? It’s a coffee machine.

            When I showed up I only saw one guy using it. I think he’s the only one who knew what it was. There’s no sign or bright light to entice you. There are just two little trays in the middle

and a small, dim light close by. I eventually got up enough nerve to go visit it. I wasn’t sure what I was looking at. I did find some cups and set one on a tray.

            Then I pushed the dim light and Hoochie Mama! There were at least 10 lit rectangles with pictures displaying different coffee-like drinks. Only one of them was labeled “coffee”. Among the others were cappuccino, latte, espresso, frappuccino, and a lot of other names that end in “o”. 

            I pushed the latte button and waited. Nothing. About that time, God sent over an old man who grabbed a cup and stood next to me. “Do you know what you’re doing?” That guy took me through the entire procedure. After he showed me, it was easy. Of course, I’m a fast learner. – Beg pardon?

            “Mark! Mark Hayter!”

            Whoa, that’s gotta be for me. Wait here and I’ll--. “Mr. Hayter, would you like to come back and visit your wife?”

            That woman must be the sister of the walking, talking cell phone lady. Look, y’all go grab that nice guy in the chair yonder and drag him to the coffee machine. He’ll show you how it’s done. I’ll be back in a bit. – An hour or so later.

            I’m sorry I left you hanging. I went ahead and got the car and drove Kay home. I hope you liked the coffee. Wasn’t that man nice? I believe there are many more kind people in the world than mean and inconsiderate people. I need to keep reminding myself of that.

What? Oh, I meant to tell you. Kay’s doing fine. I won’t make you show up during her interocular astigmatism procedure. Me? I’m eager to revisit the coffee machine.

end

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