Hayter’s article for Aug 7, 2022
“The Good the Bad and the Worst”
Last week’s article had to do with how complicated it is to make a solar-powered dancing flower. I have every confidence that I’m the only person to ever touch on that topic. This week, I’m taking us down a different road.
We’re going to look at the bad stuff that some of us will live to see. You might want to buckle up. Last Wednesday, I found a headline that read: “Solar activity is currently increasing and with it will come solar storms.”
That’s depressing as all get out. I can’t build a solar-powered dancing flower, so I doubt I’ll be able to avert an approaching solar storm. So, my approach to a solar event is “Big deal. Live with it.”
The cause of the storm is tied to the observance of a hole in the sun. One might ask, “What causes a hole in the sun?” A good answer might be that you’d have to be there to find out.
Wednesday’s storm was supposed to mostly affect Canada. It couldn’t have been all that bad, because it didn’t interfere with me watching the Canadian TV sitcom “Corner Gas”.
The solar storm likely caused the Northern Lights to wander a bit further south. In October of 2011, there was a solar event that caused the Northern Lights to wander into North Texas. I was in Conroe at the time, so I had a better chance of seeing the Southern Lights. The Northern Lights are called Aurora Borealis and the Southern Lights are Aurora Australis. I have every confidence that I’ll see neither.
In 2025, a more powerful solar storm is due to hit Earth. Were it not for our planet’s magnetic field, it would have a devastating effect on almost every device in the world. The possible exception being bottle openers. Mars has no magnetic field, so if you time a 2025 Trip to the Red Planet, your hair will become electrified shortly before your brain melts.
Solar events mess us up much more now than they did a century or two ago. That’s because practically every worthwhile gadget on this planet depends on microchips, so any unprotected chips would get fried by a severe solar storm.
But let’s get past solar storms. Movies have been made illustrating the results of some of the other cataclysmic events coming our way. One apocalyptic event will be climate change. Boo! Many of us know that climate change is a hoax created by sane citizens from each country who are experiencing it.
At the moment, climate change is doing its worst damage to third-world nations. Soon it will take a toll on second-world nations like Russia and China. Since the U.S.is a first-world nation, at some point, we’ll hopefully become more involved than we are now.
We’ll also due to experience a few more Global pandemics. While COVID, thus far, has killed only six million people, the big one is predicted to kill more than half of us. That’s only because less than half of us will realize that it’s not a hoax.
You may not be aware of the current threat we are facing concerning the underground volcanic activity going on in Yellowstone, Mt Ranier, and four other volcanoes in Washington State. Those are only a few that threaten the world. Central and South America have active volcanoes, as do practically every piece of land that borders the Pacific Ocean. There are even a dozen active undersea volcanoes between Greenland and Norway. Not to mention the volcanoes created all across the country at elementary science fairs. – At least you can show a grin, can’t you?
There is little chance that the world will be destroyed by a massive chain of volcanic eruptions, but a Krokatoa event or two could cause volcanic ash to circle the globe multiple times. Something like that could prevent an entire growing season. But, perhaps it would curtail global warming.
Then there is the possibility of a bolide event. I wouldn’t know a “bolide” from a cow’s foot, had I not read about it on Space.com. A bolide is a large chunk of something that’s moving through space. It could be a comet, meteor, defunct space station, or a wrecked alien spacecraft. It’s something that the earth’s magnetic field will not be able to protect us from.
I think the dinosaurs had more warning before they met the gigantic meteor that hit the Yucatan, turning it into a peninsula. Even if the dinosaurs had been able to determine the time, size, and speed of a bolide, it’s doubtful they would’ve been able to effectively react to it. Where are they gonna go?
Another supposed disaster involves vampires. I don’t know about you, but I’m sick of vampires. The vampires coming our way are supposed to be afflicted with a strange pandemic that will make us want to bite one another. Forget beef and chicken. Vampires want to bite fellow humans. I don’t see this one happening in my lifetime.
I don’t know that many of the events I’ve mentioned would kill off everyone on the planet, but practically every catastrophe will ruin some of our leisure time. Television? Forget it. Movies? I don’t think so. Dr Pepper? In your dreams.
And let’s not rule out the possibility of an alien invasion. If that were to happen during our vampire apocalypse, we may survive it. The movie version is in the making.
The only good news I see in any of this comes from the realization that none of these apocalyptic events will cause our elementary school kids to do the duck and cover like some of us did in the 50s and 60s. Actually, I found them to be a pleasant diversion during the school day.
That’s the story for this week. Kay told me that to improve my articles, we’ll have to do something interesting. I love her to pieces, but the woman has no tact.
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